So here I am a week into my physical make-over.
And dad was worried....hah!

Of course these pills are making me feel a little weird.

I ate steel wool today for breakfast. Is that weird?

I have a craving for more...

It's been going great! These shots I have to take every day are expensive, but whatever. The 14 pounds of muscle I've managed to put on in the last 72 hours is worth it. Of course it'd be better if it wasn't all in one leg, but hey, you gotta start somewhere, right?



I'm packing up right now.

Everything I've managed to assemble over the past six years is once again being boxed up and set aside. I decided to organize a few things this time, though. Like all of the bills and what not that I've been getting in the mail for a while. (There are a lot of them too! It's like they send this crap every month or something.) A great deal about student loans and what not, but I just decide it's best to continue using those as toilet paper, as I have been for the past couple of months.

Crazy, isn't it? You get a job, and you're poorer than ever. Oh well. I'm getting by. I found an old toothbrush I thought I threw out behind the toilet yesterday. It didn't look quite as worn out as the one I had, so I started using it again.

The word "toilet" turns a lot of people off. As though some people think its something dirty. More girls have stopped talking to me when I start talking about the toilet. What's the big deal?!! If it was dirty, it would be something we cleaned all the time! But look at mine! I haven't cleaned it in months and it still works just fine!

Stupid girls.


One of the things I've encountered in packing up is my box of photographs which has been collecting all of the photos I've snapped since freshman year. There were a few things I'd forgotten... like how bad a photographer I am. How much happier I am with the digital camera that allows me to make mistakes and not find out about them until AFTER I have the pictures developed...
anyway, I was rather revealingly able to track my weight gain over the past six years through these photographs. Here's a breakdown:

Freshman year: Skinny little do-gooder kid from the farm. High and shining aspirations, even shinier forehead. Acne control a thing of the future. Slim, but no threat to the ninjas which regularly stalk the hallways of my dormitory.

Sophomore year: The pinacle of good looks and fashion. Have crazy roommate and crazy girlfriend who school young farm boy in the ways of fashion and stupid behavior. Student proves to be a remarkably quick study. At least in one of the lessons.

Junior year: Sad times, and the aspiring violist turns to late night snacking to fill the void once occupied by studying. Times are rough, but so are the gastro-intestinal episodes. Student's body responds to emergencies by calling in reserve forces which set up camp next to the student's existing chin, reinforcing this position. Waistline at this point decides to abanon all hope of finding the 32-inch pants that it lost, so decides theres no longer any reason to wait around for them any more. Time to grow up(out) and throw out the childish notions of svelte good looks and atheletic prowess. Buttockular region decides this is phenomenal idea and alligns its efforts with the waist and forms a coalition to fight against all clothing the student owns. Eventually, victory is assured.

Senior year: Student convinces family and friends that "weight training" has added to his girth and bulk, and he is now in a stronger place than ever before. The flesh on his shoulders laughs (behind his back, of course.)

Graduate years: Buys couch, and it is the end of existence as we know it.

This pretty much brings us up to date.

I've taped some photos of sophomore year to the wall of my room for inspiration. I know this is what I'll have to get back to in order to take the job with the Air Force, and I will get there. It's just been a long ways since that time. God grant me strength.

(I know I'm gonna hear about that "crazy girlfriend" thing in a while...)

T.